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: كيف أكون ؟
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أرسل يوم الخميس 29 أيار 2003 بواسطة |
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 زائر كتب "
معتصم فريد تقلا
كيف أكون
من أنا؟
من أكون؟
قارورة خمرٍ؟
أم قارُورةَ زيت؟
سُنبلةَ قمحٍ ؟
أم غصنَ زيتون
من أنا؟
من أكون؟
هل زهرةُ الياسمين؟
أم زهرةُ الأقحوان؟
أنرجسٌ أبيض؟
أم زهرُ بيلسان؟
أهذا أنا؟
أهكذا أكون؟
أم أنني رمادٌ وغبار؟
تنثُره الريحُ حيث تشاء
ويأخذ منه من يشاء
أو أنني عود ثقاب؟
أشتعل متى أريد
وأحرقُ من أريد
أهذا أنا؟
أهكذا أكون؟
************
أنا الزيت والنار
أنا القمح والنّار
أنا الخمرةُ والزقاق
أنا القلبُ الخفَّاق
لا......
لا......
لستُ هذا أنا
ولا أعرف من أنا
وكيف أكون أنا
ما أعرفه......
أنني مجموعة ألوانٍ
بيضاءُ وسوداء
زرقاءُ وحمراء
صفراءُ وخضراء
ما أعرفهُ أنني
حقلٌ من الياسمين
إن كنتُ أشاء
ما أعرفه......
أنني ليلٌ ونهار
إن كنتُ أشاء
أنني خيرٌ ودمار
إن كنتُ أشاء
فكيف أكون؟
أهكذا يكون السؤال؟
أأكون كما تريد؟
أو كما أريد
كم صعبٌ الاختيار.
معتصم فريد تقلا
15/5/2003"
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المعدل: 4.57
تصويتات: 26
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Re: كيف أكون ؟ (التقييم: 1)
بواسطة kholod في الخميس 27 تشرين الثاني 2003
Not registered user | من أنا......
منذ زمن بعيد.......حاولت تجاهل ونسيان هذا السؤال.....
لانيي في الحقيقه.....قليلا ما ادرك من انا....
او احاول ان افكر بهذه الانا..............
لانني ان فتشت حقيقه ....فلم أعثر عليها وسط كل هذا الضياع والتخبط الذي تغرق به روحي.....
ولكن.....اليوم....احد هم وجهه اليا.. هذا السؤال..
.هل ليهرب من أسئلتي... او فعلا ليعرف من انا...............لست ادري....
السؤال هذا فعلا أعادني الى واقعي وكياني...
وفعلا انا نفسي وجهت لها هذا السؤال...
و بدأت احاول البحث عن ذاتي بذاتي...وسألتها فجأة من انت..........
مسكينه ..تفاجئت....لم تتوقع هذا.......
وأحسستها تئن...تطلق الاهات...
أحسستها مجروحه...تعاني الصدمات....
وحيده بكل شيئ داخلها...احسستها ..تطير...تحلق...ترسم...وتحلم...
ولكن في النهايه تعود وحيدة للارض مكسورة الجناح... دامعة القلب...
تمهلي بالله عليك ايتها الذات...أخبريني. وساعديني...
ومن ضياعي أنقذيني....
دعيني أتعرف.... أسألك..من أنا...
هل حقا انا انسانة....أم حشره في وحل الحياة....
هل أنا أعيش.....أم أحتظر مع الزمان...
سعيدة أنا.......أم شقية...........
أحقا أنا بسمة على شفاه الفرحين...أم دمعة في عيون المعذبين
هل أنا الضعف....أم القوة..
الحب .....أو الكراهية....
الضياع...أو...الامل......
اين انا من نفسي...من ذاتي وكياني...من أحلامي وأمالي...
الان أتذكر شيئا ينحر اعمافي كالسكين...
أنني يوما بدأت الحياة بأمل..
.بأحلام ذهبيه التي ممكن لغيري أن يصفها جهنميه...
ولكنها كانت عندي حقيقة رائعه لو تحققت يوما ما...
كان أهم شيئ فيها ان احافظ على كياني الانساني...
ان لاتغيرني الظروف..
.ان أرضخ لشيئ في قاموسي..... كان غير مألوف
أن أنتصر لمبادئ عمر....طالما ناديت بها...
.لا أدري ماذا أقول... ولكن كل ما ذكرته جعلني أعود للوراء.
.لايام ان لم يكن مستحيل .....صعب جدا..نسيانها...
أيام ركبت الحلم زورقا...وأبحرت نحو عالم الاحلام..
ايا نفسي...لماذا الان تكتبين كل هذا..وتتعذبين به...لماذا..
هل هو السؤال فقط الذي أعادك لكل ذكرى الماضي.. واماله أو هناك شيئ أخر.....
لاأعرف...ولا أريد أن أعرف...
كل ما أعرفه أنني اريد التغلغل في طيات ذكرياتي..
والبحث فيها عن ذاتي...
أن أتوه في دهاليزها...
حياتي...أو حياتنا الداخليه...التي لو تعمقنا بها لاكتشفنا انها الحياة الحقيقية التي يجب أن نحياها..ولا نعترف بسواها...
اليست من تعطنا الحياة...وعمرا للعمر...ورونق للزهر..
اليست المدفونه داخلنا والتي ترفض أن تكون متطفله على ارضفة الواقع......
معلنة العصيان والرفض لمظاهرنا الخارجيه...
ما بدخلنا ...اثمن ما نملك...
أمضينا العمر في ثأثيثه...
غرفه ...غرفه.....قطعة... بقطعة...
من أن نجعلها يوما دولة مستقله...
ومنطقة حرة...خاليه من السلاح...
دون قمع.....دون ارهاب..
ولكن.....
ما زلت أتسأل...........من أنا
خلود...صلخد
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Re: كيف أكون ؟ (التقييم: 0)
بواسطة زائر في الخميس 22 شباط 2007
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Re: كيف أكون ؟ (التقييم: 0)
بواسطة زائر في الجمعة 23 شباط 2007
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Re: كيف أكون ؟ (التقييم: 0)
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Re: كيف أكون ؟ (التقييم: 0)
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Re: كيف أكون ؟ (التقييم: 0)
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